For something funny--I don't normally post email forwards, but this made me laugh when I needed it.
THE NEXT SURVIVOR SERIES
Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 3 kids each for six weeks.
Each kid will play two sports and either take music or dance classes.
There is no fast food.
Each man must take care of his 3 kids, keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework, and complete science projects, cook, do laundry, and pay a list of 'pretend' bills with not enough money.
In addition, each man will have to budget in money for groceries each week.
Each man must remember the birthdays of all their friends and relatives and send cards out on time.
Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a dentist appointment and a haircut appointment.
He must make one unscheduled and inconvenient visit per child to the Urgent Care center.
He must also make cookies or cupcakes for a social function.
Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting flowers outside, and keeping it presentable at all times.
The men will only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done.
The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, adorn themselves with jewelry, wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes, keep their fingernails polished, and their eyebrows groomed.
During one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, back aches, and have extreme, unexplained mood swings, but not complain much or slow down from other duties. Men must also keep their bodies in super-hot-model shape and in good health at all times.
They must attend weekly school meetings, church, and find time at least once to spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting.
They will need to read a book and then pray with the children each night and in the morning, feed them, dress them, brush their teeth, and comb their hair by 7:00 am.
A quiz will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information: each child's birthday, height, weight, shoe size, clothes sizes, and doctor's name Also the child's weight at birth, length at birth, time of birth, and length of labor, each child's favorite color, middle name, favorite snack, favorite song, favorite drink, favorite toy, biggest fear, and what they want to be when they grow up.
The kids vote dads off the island based on performance. The last man on the island wins only if he still has enough energy to be intimate with his spouse at a moment's notice and at least twice a week.
If the last man does win, he can play the game over and over and over again for the next 18-25 years eventually earning the right to be called a good Mother!
P.S. Series canceled...no willing contestants!
Ha! That's HILARIOUS! My husband is a HUGE survivor fan, but I don't know if he could deal with that one!
ReplyDeleteProbably wouldn't be too thrilled to participate :)
Ha! The quiz is my favorite part. I don't think my husband has ever seen one of the kiddos' doctors :) Thanks for the laugh!
ReplyDeleteOh man, I'm not doing such a good job as a mother. I don't even want to show that one to my husband. (Twice a week?!?) Thanks for sharing with me about your illness. I think it's good for all of us when the sharing happens. And we'll be keeping a close eye on my daughter. I know there's a lot going on there. But as you say, just keep the door open. If you ever want to email me anything, I guess my address doesn't appear - I dunno - haven't figured out the whole blogging thing yet - I'm at eabones@hotmail.com Glad you're feeling better. erin
ReplyDeletethat's a good job as a mother/WIFE. I know you got that, I'm just saying...
ReplyDeleteHa! I'd love to see that show!
ReplyDelete